Being a mom is hard work, NO…let me rephrase….being a PERSON is hard work!
Before I was a mom I chose my friends wisely and many of those friendships are still dear to my heart.
Some, I tried my best to be the best type of friend I could be. Honest, trustworthy and loving. However, there were many times that I was too honest, too trusting and way too loving. In these cases I learned how to work it out, or moved on knowing the relationship would get me nowhere or become toxic.
Needless to say sometimes I wanted a friendship to last waaaaay more than what my heart and mind could take.
BUT… It has taught me the type of friendships I do want in our lives.
When Theodore was born, I initially kept to myself and my family. We shared the great news with our friends, but kept all the struggles within the family. At this time I was learning the new me, and was not ready to share.
Now, I know with the great people in our life I could have shared everything, but it was I who needed to accept my new life and the ups and downs.
For some this can be easy and for others this can be hard…..but once I accepted this new life I began to understand our path as a family.
I began to open up, I began to realize who I trusted and who I wanted involved in our son’s life. When this occurred we decided that certain people and things are toxic and that we did not want that in our lives. We have taken this role very seriously, and some people continue to challenge the choices we have made, but they are OURS.
The people that we have chosen to be a part of our lives mean the world to us. Some of them we see everyday and others we may not even see or talk to but every few months. They have been supportive when we have needed it and they have been distant when they knew that we needed space.
When this would occurr, they waited for us and weren’t upset that we were absent because of the time we needed. This we are greatful for and cannot express how much this has meant to us during our new journey with Theodore.
In our friendships we do not support each other or love each other any less when there are struggles or ups and downs. During these times we know there needs to be more support, love and prayers.
These people in our lives give, take and respect the same values we hold dear. Honesty, trustworthiness, and love. Sometimes we are all are little too honest, a little too trusting, and give way too much love.
But….we all balance each other out. We trust each others words, listen with honesty and love each others individuality.
These are my people and most of them live all around the United States and soon to be all around the WORLD, and some have passed on but I speak to them often. Some are newer friends and others are old old friends, but we know our group of friends will continue to grow as our lives change.
Distance, is never an object with my people.
Although it hurts sometimes that I can’t wake up in the same house with them, walk down the road, swim in their pool, see them sitting next to me at work, or meet up with them for a mid-afternoon glass(bottle) of wine to cry or laugh it out……..I know they will always be my people. I know that they will always be my support team, good or bad. I know that they will love us unconditionally and too me, this means the world.
I pray and hope that everyone has the type of love and support that I have learned exists in my life. I hope that Theodore understands the value of the love and support he endures every single day of his life. I pray he recognizes his support team will grow as we share our story and to choose those who mean the best.
I will, Report to Duty, every single day to show and explain (the appropriate stories) to him on how WONDERFUL these people are in his life. Eventually, I will shine light on these people as he begins to recognize his perfect support team and I will teach him the value of true and honest friendships.
Until next time,
Reporting to Duty