Happy Mother’s Day 

I have had the opportunity to look up to some pretty great mothers in my life. They have taught me a great deal and have showed me unconditional love. 

Before becoming a mother I knew I wanted to cherish these role models, and tools of motherhood. BUT…. I also knew I had to make my own rules and guidelines. 

I have to think just two short years ago I was not even a mother. I had not been through the trudges of motherhood or knew what was coming to our life. 

We were expecting but I had no clue how UNIQUELY BEAUTIFUL our life would become. 

I had no clue that you could love so much that it would hurt. 

I had no clue how much responsibility it is to take care of such a tiny life. 

I had no clue that no other job would be as gratifying as being Theodore and Oliver’s  mother. 

However, this has been the hardest most rewarding job and role I have ever done. 

Some days it has been significantly lonely, and it has been many times thankless. I have bawled, screamed, ugly cried and cursed. I have fought depression, anxiety and have struggled with jealousy. I have felt alone, judged and hopeless. I have wanted more support and struggled with the WHY.

It is the scariest thing I have ever done being these boy’s mommy.

This job… being a MOTHER has changed who I am deep into my soul. 

Although, it has been hard I wouldn’t change it for the world. I would not have it taken back and I am NOT giving up. 

NOW…TWO years later……I like to think that I am an improved version of myself. 

“MaMA” has been my most favorite role, job, title and life perspective.

BUT….

I have apologize to all mother’s because I thought becoming a mother would be different. I didn’t necessarily think it would be easier, or more rewarding but different. 

BUT

It is so sooooooo much more……

It is EVERYTHING.
Happy Mother’s Day to mother’s of all kinds. 

I will be, Reporting to Duty, this Mother’s Day. I will be giving my boys some extra love and spending it knee deep in motherhood. I will be continuing to try to take more time and cherish the good with the bad. I will continue to take in the scent of their skin, the rhythm of their beating heart and the warmth of their hugs. 

I will cherish motherhood. 
CHEERS! I make a toast to you!! And do something great for yourself mother’s!!!
Until Next Time,
Reporting to Duty 
Xox

Preparing…

Getting ready for Baby Miller #2 has been anything BUT whimsical. Part of the reason why I have been MIA.

After vacation and Theodore’s first birthday we all came home to North Carolina and hit the ground running. My husband and I were making a good pace, but Theodore decided, yet again, to take his own.

This causing my “plan” to be off schedule. You would think, by now, that I would understand planning is a recipe for disaster…..but I never follow suit.

So instead of getting things ready we have spent countless minutes and hours trying to understand Theodore’s feeding.

To catch you up…

Before Theodore turned a year old Keith, I and Theodore’s team of doctors decided that we would keep him on formula to continue giving him the extra nutrients. Nonetheless, we would switch from him infant sensitive formula to toddler formula.

Initially we tried a standard formula and he was eating it but you could tell it wasn’t his favorite. Then he quit drinking, all together. So we started trying all types of toddler formula. NONE I mean NONE were suiting him.

We went to the doctor in fear of teething, ear ache or any other answer….. And well…..we received the diagnosis of possible continued milk protein intolerance and STUBBORNNESS!!

They were worried because he has not gained any weight but has grown pretty much 2 inches in less than a months. Soooo…. The mystery continues and he needs to be drinking, drinking, DRINKING!!!
A few days in and no drinking/fluids we tried giving him his old infant formula! It didnt work initially and we had to find another avanue. So….. while we feed him his old formula and we massage his jaw while he eats!! He has since been drinking but you have to hold his jaw.

i did this on a fluke and it WORKED!!

Weird, right???

After googling it we found that is is not as rare as we think. Some babies jaws hurt while they are teething and with Theodore’s low muscle tone it is causing him more stress on his jaw.

Because of this and it being weird we still are going to find further consultation. Let’s all pray for answers.

So now, in the midst of figuring Theodore out I started deep cleaning and I finally have finished some hospital packing….although a great deal of laundry needs to be completed…..any takers????

Since we have two weeks until the due date we all……

We are trying to remain calm and continue our daily lives. This includes getting Theodore signed up for therapy in NC, getting the room ready for the baby(crafting, DIYing, organizing) making sure we have the proper baby items in the house and continuing with all doctors apts.

I am fearful of the change that the new baby may bring to Theodore. However, I have to keep an open mind and know this is the plan that was chosen for us.

Now we will, Report to Duty, in settling back in and getting ready for the baby! We also will continue to encourage growth for Theodore.

Until Next time,

Reporting to Duty
Xox

Wanna’ be Yogi , Reporting to Duty!

Hey, Hey Heeeeey Everyone!! Hope you all are having a great day. Today, it is beautiful here in NC and my day has begun in a beautiful fashion. I have to admit I do miss my Marine terribly, but it was nice being able to have a morning to myself and not be subconsciously forced to attend his Saturday Morning softball game ( don’t worry I do enjoy the games and watching him play). So instead of church league softball, I was able to have my morning cup of Starbucks Coffee and small slice of bread before I headed to my HOT YOGA CLASS.

My Hot Yoga Journey has been interesting. When I first heard of Hot Yoga I was working at Urban Environments in Chicago, and my boss, Kim Chapman told me about Hot Bikram Yoga’s GREAT POWERS. I often spent many afternoons watching Kim show me the poses and explaining how it would change my life. However, at the time I believed she was “bat-shit crazy” and neurotic. Over and over, I kept asking myself why I would want to be in a room where it is over 96 degrees, sweat my ass off, refuse myself water and force myself into impossible moves/poses.

I have to admit the idea of Hot Yoga or Hot Bikram Yoga seems terrible, but the practice and its rewards ARE Powerful. I began my practice at the beginning of January 2014. When I first took the Hot Yoga class I had sweat running over all areas of my body and I fell out of many of the poses. It was absolutely gross, but when there were moments where I was able to get deeper into a pose or stick the pose it was extremely rewarding.

Now, I practice all forms of yoga and I challenge myself to get better during each practice.  While I was in Knoxville, TN I attended classes at Real Hot Yoga which in my opinion is a more modern and fast pace studio. Now, I practice at A Hopeful Balance in New Bern, NC which again in my opinion is a more  individualized, and therapeutic studio. Both have been great in furthering my practice and I suggest either if you are in either location.

Both studios taught me to accept myself and my practice. This has allowed me to have no judgment (which is a yoga lesson) and that yoga is a personal Journey, as is life. The classes are not only exercise for me but they are my therapy.

Another aspect that has helped me become more comfortable and positive in my Yoga Practice has been my Marine. Through out, the week he works out and PT’s multiple times. Often, I get down on myself, because I am not as athletic or fit as him. However, through out my yoga journey I have learned and accepted that we are different. Also, I have slowly begun to accept and understand that men’s and women’s bodies do work differently when it comes to exercise. I am appreciative that my Marine has helped me learn this and I am grateful that he continues to help me learn.

Today, I challenge all of you to push yourself to do something that you might be afraid of or that you feel you may be unable to complete. I want you to do it without judgment and I want you to share it with someone you love.

Have a fab DAY!!!

Marine Wife Reporting to Duty